


The Best Bit

by ActiveAgression



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: M/M, Michael's kind of a slut, Multi, Ridiculous, Telepathic! Ryan, Telepathy, everyone is though, talking about sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-10
Updated: 2016-01-10
Packaged: 2018-05-12 23:18:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5685307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ActiveAgression/pseuds/ActiveAgression
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryan thinks he may need to stop at a bookshop on the way home, pick up something like 'what to do when you're telepathic and forgot to tell your boss and now you've got a head full of your colleages having sex with each other and you don't even know if it's real or not'. </p><p>And dear God, he should not have peeked at Michael's mind...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Best Bit

**Author's Note:**

> This was fun to write and mostly just vaguely fluffy crack. 
> 
> Have fun!
> 
> Tell me what you think and all that...

Ryan probably should’ve at least warned his coworkers about his telepathy, given them a pamphlet so they could read up on ‘shielding your mind’ or ‘keeping your thoughts to yourself,’ but he’d been so excited they’d even accepted him, he’d completely forgot about it. 

It’s not like telepathy is non-existent to them, it’s just rare in general and sometimes Geoff pulls up an article about mind reading and reads it aloud for everyone, because after all - it is fascinating to people who don’t have it. 

And a pain in the ass for those who do, Ryan thinks because how in the fuck is he meant to tell them now? 

‘Oh hey guys, by the way i’m kind of telepathic,’ seems like it wouldn’t go down so well with anyone. Especially after he hadn’t warned them and now has intimate detail about all of their lives in ways he shouldn’t. 

He’s seen literal images, swirling through hazily and coloured unnaturally, of Gavin getting fucked by Geoff and has no idea whether it really happened or if Gavin’s dreamt it up… or if Geoff dreamt it up. 

Not only is it sometimes hard to tell who’s thinking what in the small office, but dreams people think of after usually take on an unnatural quality to them because at heart they were unnatural - they're dreams after all - they’re often hard to make out as well because people don’t remember their dreams so well.  
The problem being that the same thing is achieved when someone’s thinking of something from an angle they hadn’t actually witnessed or if they were drunk or if their minds just decide to view things that way.  
Ryan has no idea whatsoever if Geoff and Gavin have actually had sex or if one of them just likes thinking about it and that's not the worst bit. 

Ryan’s seen Ray sucking people off through a glory hole in a club bathroom and he also doesn’t know if that’s really happened because the image is a mess of being there and not being there and Ryan can’t tell if that’s because it’s a dream or if it’s because Ray was drunk at the time or if Ray simply tried to block out the memory from his mind.  
Ryan tries valiantly to try and block it from his mind but sometimes it slips through; whether Ray’s thinking of it or Ryan is now, he doesn’t know but sometimes it’s there in his mind and won't go away and Ryan hates it and himself because it’s hot, it’s really hot.  
Ray’s depraved and blowing a stranger in a bathroom and every time Ryan sees the possibly false memory, his dick does it’s own thing and refuses to cooperate.  
This is also not the worst bit. 

Ryan has seen Jack and Geoff and Gavin going at it too. Whether false or not, he’s hard at his desk and can’t keep eye contact with anyone. 

Ryan’s seen five of the Achievement Hunters arguing about who gets to take Ray’s virginity and knows it’s not real because hell, he was in it, but someone in the room is thinking of that and Ryan just wants to pinpoint who. 

Ryan’s seen Gavin skewered like a spit roast between Michael and Geoff and the room felt way too hot that day until Ryan escaped into the carpark to cool off. Holy shit… what if it is real?

It occurs to Ryan after months working with them that he never hears Michael’s thoughts.

The man in question is leant over the arm of his chair, teasing Gavin and smiling in a particularly wicked way but Ryan can’t even hear what he’s saying echoing in the air.  
So, to be fair to everyone else, Ryan delves a little. 

He pokes at Michael’s mind and like flood gates, memories assault him in crystal clear viewing quality; memories of a younger Ray, spread out naked over a blue bedspread and whimpering, whining, clutching at nothing with his hands while Michael achingly slowly stretches him open.

Ryan sees Gavin pushed against the side of a building in the rain, rutting against Michael without abandon, head thrown back and eyes screwed shut.  
Ryan sees the familiar rug from Burnie’s office and can hear the moans Michael’s expelling as he’s fucked over the desk by Jack of all people. 

There’s a soft warm memory of Geoff sitting on his couch, blankets thrown to the side as Michael takes his boss in his mouth and sucks wetly. 

The spitroast Gavin thing sings into his mind too and another delectable picture of Ray trembling on his hands and knees as he takes it from behind, shuddering forward with every thrust. 

They’re memories though, definately memories unlike the uncertainties of the other’s minds.  
‘Michael’s a slut!’ Ryan thinks and the idea turns him on more than he’d like to admit but as the memories wash through, Ryan hears a gasp come from behind him and turns to see Michael’s eyes flitting about the room at everyone, resting on Ryan’s confused expression before moving over everyone else. 

“Someone in here has telepathy,” Michael declares while all Ryan can think is, ‘oh shit.’ 

This is the worst bit. 

“Who?” Geoff asks and then, “and how do you know?” 

Michael huffs, crossing his arms over his chest tightly, “i just felt him read my mind.” 

“You felt him?” Geoff asks and Ryan really doesn’t see how the man can talk to Michael so casually when Michael’s sucked him off and a whole list of other things that Ryan shouldn't have seen.  
Michael’s mind is closed up tightly once more and Ryan doesn’t even try to look this time, knowing better. He even builds his barriers up so nothing gets through, it’s disorientating but he can’t know what everyone’s thinking right now, they’re probably angry.

“I have training with shielding my mind,” Michael admits, “i wasn’t expecting it though.” His eyes trace around the room again, “which ever one of us that did it just got a whole lot of memory they weren’t expecting.” Ryan almost laughs, Jesus… 

Michael tree sap eyes harden into amber and he shifts in his seat.  
“I just felt someone entering my mind and my mind stupidly was like, ‘don’t let him see…’ and threw up a bunch of really inappropriate memories.” 

“Okay,” Geoff sighs to the entire room, “who is it? We won't be mad, really.” 

He sounds resigned and tired and Ryan knows he should admit to it but everyone’s still looking a little shell shocked and probably a whole lot worried about what the other’s may have seen between them and Michael so he can’t bring himself to speak and Geoff gets angry. 

“You know, there are actually laws about informing your place of work when you have telepathy,” he growls, “laws!” 

“Maybe i was wrong,” Michael says, looking sheepish and Geoff glares at him too. 

“I have to report this,” Geoff declares, “everyone go home.”  
With that he swivels and marches out the door and they all watch him go. 

“Shit,” Ray says and Gavin turns to face him. 

“Is it you Ray?” he asks and Ray shakes his head. 

“Nah it’s not but as everyone here’s going to say that, i guess it doesn’t really matter what i say.” 

“Look,” Michael begins, trying to open a new thread of conversation though he wishes he didn’t have to, “one of you just got a hell of a lot of sex images and i’m sorry but this is why i got lessons in the first place. You’re meant to respect privacy or some shit,” Michael growls and Ryan hangs his head as “sorry” slips past his lips unintentionally. 

Everyone turns to stare at him.

“You?” Michael asks and then bursts out laughing while everyone else grows confused by the reaction.  
“God,” Michael says, wiping his eyes, “of course the only person in this office i haven’t had sex with sees it. Of course.” 

[“You haven’t?” Ray comments but gets no response. ]

“I’m really sorry,” Ryan apologises, “i just - i could see everyone else’s mind and it only seemed fair to also know yours and i didn’t realise they were intentional barriers.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Jack speaks up from his long silence and Ryan tries not to think of him fucking Michael over Burnie’s desk and fails. 

“It entirely skipped my mind until i was here and then i knew too much already and i didn’t know how to bring it up.” 

“So now you know i’m a slut. Everyone else knows, and now you too,” Michael says like it’s some sort of achievement, “and i didn’t even have sex with you.” 

“To be honest, i already knew that a little,” he says and Michael turns to glare at him. 

“Well, everyone in this office is. If they aren’t thinking about fucking their coworkers, they’re actually doing it,” he says and Michael sneers at him. 

“Like you haven’t,” he snarls. 

“Thought about it, sure,” Ryan admits, “but i haven’t done anything.” 

“Really?” Ray asks, incredulous and curious, “none of us?” 

“Well, yeah. I thought you were all like secretly dating or something.” 

“Why?” Jack asks, looking pensive and thoughtful. 

“What am I meant to think? Most of what I see is hard to tell whether it’s real or not. But I know for fact that Ray’s woken up in bed with the four of you and I know that Geoff’s been blown by at least Jack and Gavin [oh and Michael now!] and that one of you had a fantasy where we all argued - me included - about who’d take Ray’s virginity which is ridiculous because I saw him lose it to Michael not even ten minutes ago and before then i’d seen Geoff and Gavin and even Joel fucking him and him fucking Gavin too and really, why am I the only one not involved with any of this?” he finishes, out of breath and red in the face. 

“Joel?” Michael asks, teasingly turning to Ray. 

“I thought you were,” Ray admits, ignoring Michael “I thought you were going out to lunch with Jack to like have quick sex in some semi public place.” 

“I thought you were straight,” Jack says, sounding like he still thinks that very much but isn’t going to say any more on it. 

“You and Michael weren’t doing it?” Gavin half asks, half realises. 

“Well, we all thought you were at least doing Geoff,” Michael growls and Ryan stares at them all. 

“This is ridiculous,” he finally mutters and the door behind him opens and closes and, “what’s ridiculous?” Geoff asks. 

“You’re all having sex with each other while no one’s having sex with me but you all thought someone else was having sex with me. How did i not pick up on this?”

“What?” Geoff asks and Ryan turns towards him suddenly and oddly pointed. 

“Why don’t you guys just form one giant relationship?” he asks and Geoff actually blushes. 

“Uh - what?” 

“Well you’re already banging everyone. Why would you not be?” Ryan asks, knowing it didn’t really make full logical sense but deciding not to care. 

“There’s really no house big enou- what have you guys been talking about in here!” he cuts himself off to yell. 

“Well,” Ray drawls, “first Michael got upset and Ryan apologised for being a telepath and raping his brain and then Michael called himself a slut and Ryan said we all had sex with each other or at least thought about it and then we found out he isn’t actually fucking any one of us.”

Geoff stares and chooses the most important part of information to discuss first, “Really, no one? Not even Michael?” he asks, brow furrowed and Michael growls. 

“Why am i the ‘not even’?”

“No one,” Ryan confirms. 

“Well fuck,” Geoff curses, “i just went and gloated to Gus that i’d fucked a telepath and turns out I actually haven’t.” 

“What?” Jack chokes and Ray clears his throat. 

“So we all want to have sex with Ryan?” he clarifies to dumb nods and he nods himself but decisively. 

“Right then,” he says, standing up, “let’s go.”  
Everyone turns confused eyebrows at him. 

“Where?” Gavin asks for them all. 

“Geoff’s house, where we can all have kinky telepathic sex with Ryan and then maybe talk about that giant relationship thing again and-” 

“We’ll get some bevs!” Gavin declares already halfway out the door and dragging Michael with him. “Meet you there!” 

Everyone else head out eagerly, going for their cars but Ryan pulls Ray back by the collar of his shirt. 

“Ray,” he begins and Ray gives him an irritated glare. 

“Yes, we are all okay with this, clearly and we give consent and i’m old enough to give consent despite how old i look so really it’s fine,” he growls and Ryan raises an eyebrow down at him. 

“No it’s not that - i mean i saw you younger so i-” 

“You saw me younger?” Ray interrupts. 

“Yeah, it was one of Michael’s memories. I did say i saw you losing your virginity to him.” 

“I thought you were just making a point, not that you’d actually seen - god, that’s embarrassing,” Ray babbles, wringing his hands together. 

“Actually it was really hot, despite how illegal and creepy that may be for me to say,” Ryan comments and Ray chuckles. 

“Then what-?” he asks, gesturing around them and at the door a little. 

“Well its… well. Was the glory hole thing like a dream or…” he trails off as Ray somehow simultaneously pales and flushes and his whole face goes slack.

“Dream,” he finally manages and nods awkwardly, striding out of the door over to the carpark whispering ‘oh my god’ the entire way. 

Ryan follows along and later, wrapped up beside his apparent new boyfriends - all naked and messy and cuddly - with Ray’s face tucked in against his chest and Geoff’s tattooed arms striking contrast as they curl around Ryan’s waist, thoughts swirl around him absently and he tries not to laugh at Ray’s dream playing out in his head.  
With Ray so close, it’s hard to focus on any other thoughts and Ray’s got himself starred as the lead role of ‘Casa Erotica’ and Ray in a pizza man’s uniform should not be as cute as Ryan’s finding it. 

This. This is the best bit.


End file.
